Follow Me To The Corna

For those who know me, it's no secret that I want to become a sports journalism someday. It's also no secret that that journalism game is ending faster than my Celtics' chance to repeat. I was always hesitant about blogs. I always recognized the power of the blog, but never though it would take anyone far. After being introduced to Club Trillion, I changed my perception. Blogs are the future, like it or not. I might not be anchoring Sportscenter anytime soon, but hopefully this is a step in the right direction

Now that's out of the way. Let me take you to the corna. It's time the world sees the true world of sports. How it really is. The way I see it. Seeing as this is the pilot blog. I'm putting everything out there. In my humble opinion, I'm going to revolutionize the blogging game. Call me Brock Lesnar because I AM the next big thing. Okay, not really but a guy can dream. In future posts, you will see subject matter all over the place. Obviously sports will be my ace pitcher, but a good rotation needs more than just Jon Lester. You need a strong bullpen. That's where pop culture and that good stuff comes in. I'll sprinkle some of that like Spongebob uses "sentence enhancers" just to spice things up a little bit.

So here we go...

N.Y. Yankees-4, Cleveland Indians-22.
I still don't understand how people still praise Ching Ming Wang at all. The guy can't strike anyone out. To be successful in the Majors, you need pitchers that get batters out. Career strikouts for Wang-282. 2007 Jake Peavy-240. Career starts for Wang-99. 2007 starts for Peavy-34. What happens when you can't get hitters to strike out? They get on base. What happens once they reach the bases? They usually end up scoring. Let me give Mr. Cashman and Mr. Giradi a little lesson on Sports 101. When you get outscored, you lose. Epstein FTW.

Turnaround is fair game.

Boston Celtics-103, Chicago Bulls-105 OT.
Yeah, I know I can pull out the injury card. The Big Ticket, Garnett, wasn't playing but if he was the Selts would have won. Hell, there wouldn't even be an overtime. But what kind of Celtics fan do you think I am? Plain and simple: The Celtics lost the game and the Bulls won the game. They actually got a win over the Green in the playoffs. The great MJ couldn't do it, but of course a rookie point guard could come in and give a Stewie Griffin beatdown to Boston. There's still hope though. Maybe Ray Allen can actually drain a basket, let alone a 3. Maybe The Truth will realize that the game of basketball actually starts at the first quarter. And maybe, just maybe, Big Baby Davis can find some Sparknotes on how to play power forward. Here's hoping the Celtics draft Mark Titus some day.


Time for me to once again become a disillusioned Red Sox fan.
We don't need Dice-K. Three starts isn't too bad. We can deal just fine. Buchholz to kick it into overdrive. Best young pitcher of all time. Beckett to be suspended for 6 games. Let's just have Justin Masterson pick up the slack. He's unhittable. Lowrie might be out for the season. It's cool. Julio Lugo is on his way ba....WHO THE FUCK AM I KIDDING?!?! Our glowing aura of hope is Lugo? Theo, if you're out there. Trade Buchholz for Halladay. Bring up Daniel Bard. NOW! Abandon ship. Time to jump off the Tobin!

Then again, I shouldn't be giving Epstein any advice. In Theo We Trust. He hasn't let us down yet.

And on that note:

Get well soon, Danny Ainge.